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Just Beat It or Jackson Five Across Yo' Eyes
Season 1, Episode 1
Just Beat It or Jackson Five Across Yo Eyes
Air date July 15, 2012
Prod. Code 101
Written by Carl Jones
Brian Ash
Directed by Carl Jones
Justin Bridge
Episode Guide
Previous:
"Trouble on Puppet Street"
Next:
"Bullhorn Nights or Murder She Throats"

Just Beat It or Jackson Five Across Yo' Eyes is the first episode of Season 1 of Black Dynamite.

PlotEdit

Pint-sized pop star Michael Jackson finds a best friend in Cream Corn after he is saved from an assassination attempt. But Black Dynamite is soon to discover that the teen idol is actually a vicious alien force who has been torturing his own family. Cream Corn and Dynamite team up to take down the evil star together!

SynopsisEdit

While the crew (Black Dynamite, Bullhorn and Honey Bee) bomb a building, they run to their car and tells Cream Corn to drive away, but they all notice that he's not in the car with them and they all is trapped inside by black ninjas surrounding their car. One ninja shattered the car window and grabs Black Dynamite out, both fighting at a nearby store. While Black Dynamite is pummeled to the ground, he sees Cream Corn on TV performing on Soul Train, which gets Black Dynamite angry and smashes one of the ninjas face to the TV screen.

On Soul Train the Jackson Five performs while Cream Corn looks on in the audience. One of the Jackson brothers tumble by accident while swirling around, which cause everyone, including Joe Jackson, who watches in shock, but Michael continues on with a dance that cause the audience to cheer once more. Cream Corn tries to meet Michael Jackson backstage but was told that he couldn't go inside. After messing up on stage, Michael Jackson tells his father to kill one of his brothers in order for them to not mess up again but Joe tricks him into acting like he was going to do it by taking off his belt and pulls out a gun on Michael. Cream Corn goes to save Michael after he heard he was getting beat. Cream Corn runs to block Michael from getting shot, and after Cream Corn get shot from his behind, Joe gets arrested.

Cream Corn wakes up in the hospital calling out for Michael but Black Dynamite says he's fine thanks to him being a savior. He then notices that his crew looks all mest up and Black Dynamite tells him about how they were fighting the ninjas and he was suppose to be driving in the getaway car for them to escape. Michael Jackson shows up at the hospital while Honey Bee is astonished and Michael thanks Cream Corn for saving his life. Black Dynamite reminds Cream Corn that they still have work to do. He tells one of the black ninjas what Dr. Wu has planned, then they see people ice skating in a big snow globe with snow and after feeling sorry for Cream Corn, Michael gave him his surprise and repeatedly thanks him for this. Michael sings to Black Dynamite's crew but Black Dynamite interrupts and angrily tells Cream Corn that Michael Jackson has to go, saying the orphanage is only a place for hores and orphans only. Michael gives Black Dynamite a check to buy the orphanage but Black Dynamite denies it, making Michael depressed while moonwalking away.

While at the studio, Michael sings a song (a porody of "The Girl is Mine") but when the song was finished, Cream Corn tells him at the end of the song he should hit the note a little harder which angers Michael and he starts to punch Cream Corn a few times and Cream Corn is in shock by this. Bullhorn and Honey Bee visits Neverland and sees Cream Corn all beaten up and Cream Corn tells them that Michael did it. Bullhorn and Honey Bee goes to Black Dynamite for help as they thought Michael is not what he seems to be.

The crew goes to the state prison to meet up with Joe Jackson and he tells them about how his son Michael is not what he appears to be and Cream Corn is in trouble. Joe tells about how it all started back in Gary, Indiana, in a small house and they were poor and had nothing to do but to fu** all day and every nine months a baby will pop out and each one was less talented than the last. But one day a UFO got Katherine pregnant and at the hospital his half-alien son Michael Jackson was born and was born with talent as Michael was dancing with a moonwalk. Joe decide to raise it as his own son, and after that, the Jackson Five was created. He send Tito to a joke shop to find an afro wig and the best toy nose he could find. Joe had Katherine blacken Michael up with make-up. Joe tried to keep the secret for a long time and tells them how he's abusive towards them everytime they mess up and will never forget about what happened to Shamone.

In a dark place inside Neverland, Cream Corn tells Michael he wants to leave but Michael refuses to let him leave and tries to give Cream Corn fresh baked cookies but while Michael sniffs the cookies, his nose detach which causes Cream Corn to turn into shock and tells Cream Corn that there's something he don't know about him, he's half alien and half human. Cream Corn tries to runaway as a couple of go karts and a ferris wheel is coming behind him. Michael cathes up to him and shows Cream Corn his current self and Black Dynamite arrives in time to rescue Cream Corn. Michael gets his alien clones from the UFO while Black Dynamite, Bullhorn, Honey Bee and Cream Corn get help from Dr. Wu's ninjas. They all have an all-out battle but when one of Michael Jackson's clones were about to use his superpower on Black Dynamite, Cream Corn runs to save him but other than that Michael tries to save Cream Corn also and is injured from his behind, paying Cream Corn back for saving him and Michael apoligizes for what he has done to him and promise to start changing his ways. Before leaving, Black Dynamite suggest to Michael to go back to being his old appearance that mostly everybody loved. Dynamite gives him his face mask back (his original appearance), while he puts it back on and tells him to think about the children while Michael happily walks away singing about the children.

QuotesEdit

  • Cream Corn: (Flies over to the bed.) Look Black Dynamite, Michael Jackson has the whole whorphanage flying. Pretty soon, you ain't gonna have nobody.
  • Michael Jackson: (Flies over to Black Dynamite) Should have took the check motherfu****.
  • Black Dynamite: (Fed up with Cream Corn and his obsession with MJ) The Whorephanage is a place for whores and orphans not Michael Jackson.
  • Black Dynamite: (on a walkie-talkie speaking to Honey Bee & Bullhorn) All the ninjas in the world are no match for a couple of decent black folks working together with a plan and some explosives.

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